I don’t want to think about it anymore

I’ve been clean from sh for a little over a year but recently I’ve been some urges here and there and it scares me. It usually comes from anxiety and guilt and rn I’ve been feeling that more than ever. I’m trying to distract myself with shows and stuff but I still think about it. How do I stop it? I feel like I don’t have anyone to talk about it rn and the thoughts are getting more and more overwhelming…