I'm not sure if I like my friend

Me and my friend known each other for since elementary to college years, we had our on and off, and it's always me cutting off the relationship, sometimes I don't stand them, I don't know really why, we had our fair share of problems through the years, been the only close friend so they weren't the best with no experience, but they were trying, redoing same mistakes before learning and it wore me off even though they've gotten better.

To cut thing short, i really like taking to them I'd be laughing, sharing everything, but if I had the choice I wouldn't start a conversation, it feels like a burden for some reasons and I ghost them a lot for that, but they hints, idk if they're stupid or acting stupid but I mentioned wanting to cut content A LOT but I don't feel they want to get it