I love my mom dearly, but living with her is driving me nuts

I feel horrible even writing this, but I NEED to get it off my chest. Sorry in advance for this being so long, I have a lot on my mind. I (25F) live with my mom (62F). Her and my dad split up officially in July of 2023 after going through the process of divorce for 2.5 years. We all lived together through the whole divorce and it was brutal. My dad kept my childhood home and my mom and I moved into a house about 20 minutes away from my old one. I have little to no relationship with my dad.

My grandma died in July 2023, the day my parents got divorced. My mom has been tasked with taking care of her dad in the evenings 5 days a week (cooking his dinner, etc). This means that I am alone from about 4:30-6:30 every day, about 4-5 hours on Saturday and it is NICE. My after work routine typically consists of tanning in the sun, working out, and cooking dinner. I cook dinner for my mom and I. Which is mostly fine, I like to cook, until she complains about dinner either not being done when she gets home, or she'll make a comment about how I don't make "meals", despite not giving any input on my weekly menus. We also had an agreement that since I cook, she'll wash dishes. However, recently she has taken to scrolling on her phone for 3 hours after dinner, leaving me to do the dishes. Which is FINE, I'm capable, it's just the principle. I am also the one cleaning the house most weeks and doing all the laundry but hers. She takes care of mowing the lawn 1-2 times a week, which she enjoys, but I still get to hear about how she deserves a break for doing that despite the fact that I am taking care of literally everything else.

I am just getting so fed up. I feel like I can't breathe. I've dealt with a lot of shit in my life, and on top of having to deal with people all day at work, it has led to me being a fairly expressionless person at home (I'm not emotionless, I'm actually pretty sensitive, I just don't have an incredibly expressive neutral expression) and in the evenings, I am typically pretty tired and quiet by the time she gets home. Home is the one place that I should not have to school my face but I feel like I am constantly being asked why I'm mad, which after about 4-5 times, ACTUALLY makes me mad. For all the zodiac freaks, I am a March Pisces and she is a June Cancer. We're both emotional people but in such opposite ways and we drive each other nuts. My cousin is also a March Pisces and my aunt (a February Pisces) describes my cousin as "prickly like a cactus", which I feel I relate to.

She will also just randomly barge into my room when the door is shut after I shower (sometimes while my leave-in conditioner is setting, I will sit on my bed and look at my phone) and ask what I'm up to. She has also just busted into my room after I've gone to bed for literally no reason. Possible TMI but one night, I was charging my rose toy on my nightstand and she walked in there because she saw the light and picked it up and asked me what it was. I was MORTIFIED and so was she. She's lucky she hasn't busted into after I've gone to bed at the wrong time.

I also just feel like I can't be myself. I recently discovered that I am queer. I identify as bisexual, but I definitely am starting to wonder if I am a lesbian more often than not. I don't think I could ever bring this up to her. She isn't homophobic, it just seems like another thing that she could be a little too in my business about. I want to start dressing in a way that kind of subtly lets others know that I'm queer, but she is literally my biggest critic about my fashion choices (among other things) and I just don't wanna hear it.

Now, before anyone asks, I HAVE brought some of these things up to her and she just gets upset and it makes the house tense and uncomfortable. I truly do love my mom. I just think not living with her would do us both some good. However, houses in my area are HIGH. Even the small ones. Buying a home just isn't feasible for someone making less than $24 an hour on one income where I live and rent is also out of this world (plus, I have a dog and she deserves a yard).

If you made it this far, thank you for letting me vent ❤️