New here

New here. I'll make this as brief as possible.

At 40 a long term relationship broke up and I moved in with my parents to be a carer when they needed as they suffer bad health.

A year ago I left because I was treated badly by both parents and was sick of my covert narc mothers bs. I haven't seen her since. We text occasionally but that's it and I'm comfortable with that.

She was a good mother when I was growing up but only to a point. I have disabilities and often wonder if she was such a good mother because she enjoyed the attention. There were other things about her parenting that were pretty off.

My question is, do any of you in a similar situation miss your mother? I do quite a lot at times. I feel like I'm grieving her. I feel like she died a few years ago. It's such a sad and odd feeling.

Another question is do they get worse when they get old? I'm noticing that mine is.