the horrors of transition

i was a repper for a super long time, without knowing, i didn't pay attention to dysphoria or anything. but at some point not long ago it's like i've kinda given up on repressing. i thought to myself, well why not kinda transition. so i researched things, how people transition and what their life's like. i got to speak to some people and i got scared into the oblivion lol. it's super horrible what trans people have to go through. and me? i am Weak and Cowardly. am i okay with that? not really. but suffering from dysphoria seems to be a bit better than suffering from dysphoria And trans lifestyle. cuz like it doesn't feel you're trading up. most trans people have dysphoria even post transition and like tf. i can allow some things for myself though, like maybe stealthily microdosing estradiol without AAs just for funsies, but overall. please do welcome a new member of your community