I feel like I'm losing my head

So we dated for 3 years, and she is my first big love and relationship. Our relationship always had its (mostly) ups and downs. A big problem that persisted through the relationship was my inability to be a big romantic, something that she always wanted. The relationship was 95% fulfilling for the both of us, but if the remaining 5% are the most important, the 95% are worthless too. Come to 2 months ago, and we had a big talk about the things that are wrong in our relationship, as we wanted to move to a different country together. She basically told me that shed lost almost all romantic feelings for me. We set a deadline of 2 months to rekindle. We both put in the work, but long story short it didn’t work out, and she broke up a couple of days ago due to the lost feelings and a couple other issues. I couldn’t bring myself to go no contact, as we broke up in good faith and value her so much. We talk each day over phone or text but don’t see each other as this hurts the most. To be honest my emotions feel like a rollercoaster right now. One second, I’m happy its over because it feels like I’ve unlocked so many new emotions and the next second, I’m sad and anxious about losing the most important person in the world. She told me that she got the feelings back as the BU is going bad for her. The thing is I want to get back together (not now, I need to heal) but also, I feel like I want to try different stuff out, date other woman, taste the fruit of life as I haven’t really done that before the relationship. I just don’t know that to do, losing the relationship I value so dearly, I could grow so much in, a ship that carried me through the worst waters. On the other hand, I want to be independent, gather other experiences and just live a different life that I’ve used to live. Any advice? Similar situations?