Anyone else read The Shining? Stephen King’s portrayal of an alcoholic is identical to me, and I’m overwhelmed.

I’m only 1/3 of the way through, so no spoilers, please!

(Note: there’s also child abuse, among other heavy themes in the book; just a trigger warning for anyone interested in reading it.)

Stephen King’s portrayal of an alcoholic is mind-numbing accurate. Taking out the child abuse and the other horrific things, the way Jack battles with himself over his alcoholism, rationalizes it, has a come-to-Jesus moment and decides to quit, and then struggles with his self-image and self-judgment afterward is just masterfully done. He’s the most believable and relatable character I’ve ever read (so far lol). I have already has to put it down several times to reflect on how beautifully he describes the constant struggle.

I had 8 months under my belt, and while they weren’t perfect, they were good. I went back to drinking last December. While I’ve kept it pretty tame and under control since then, I have no illusions that I need to be under constant vigilance to keep it that way, and I know that I will need to quit again for good eventually. Moderation is too much work to be worth it, and I found I really enjoyed being the DD for my wife’s family, all of whom drink responsibly. I also touched one of my other friends into considering it, and he is having a kid soon and desperately needs to turn things around. The time for me to quit again is coming soon, I think. Even my wife, who only really drinks when I do and always less, has decided it’s not really serving her, so I think we’re going to quit together soon. I’m so fortunate to have such a fantastic soulmate in that regard.

I have every tool I need from my last stint, and I feel so confident this time around. I have no scaries about it, or apprehensions anymore about never drinking again or taking it one day at a time, either way; and if I can do it once, I can do it again, for good.

There’s no point to this post. I’m just a little rattled by The Shining, and I need to start writing and self-reflect again.