Winning call of the day (so far) - "Can you call me back so I can special order this?"

Me: "Thanks for calling Ace, how can I help?"

Him: "I'm looking at an item in the app, here's the number, do you have it?"

Me: We do not stock that ($12.99) item at any of our locations, but if you order it online, we'll have it Tuesday.

Him: Can we do this over the phone?

Me: Yes, but you would need to go through one of our cashiers, and all seven registers have lines right now, so you would be on hold for a while. If you order it online, we'll have it Tuesday.

Him: OK, then can you call me back when the lines go down?

Me: Sir, if you order it via the app right now, it will go thru automatically and we'll have it Tuesday.

Him: OK, OK, OK, fine. *hangs up*