How did y’all end up deciding to get top surgery?

I’m 19 and nonbinary and I’ve been considering it for awhile but I’m unsure. I’m consistently uncomfortable with seeing my breast at all while wearing outfits, but when my shirt’s off and I’m by myself, it’s just kinda my body ya know? Like stress balls that are attached to me that I don’t want anyone to see when I’m out and about.