First Ex Anniversary

Dear K,

Hard to believe it's been a year since we saw each other. I stopped carrying my hate for you just recently, in reality it was mostly grief. I see our past relationship as a series of pinnacle events which I wish I had more experience and self love to properly categorize in the moment, but if I could have I would have.

I still wonder how you are doing, I miss our other dog dreadfully but understand that our paths are not meant to cross again for both our sakes.

I've taken a break from dating and intimacy these past 6 months to heal and reorganize myself. Therapy has been crucial, I wish I had started before we first met.

We dated for three years and have been apart for one but all four years have belonged to you in a way that you will never know.

I don't blame you in the same way I used to. It still hurts the way you discarded me at the end but at the same time I don't know how it could have been any other way. I don't miss you, but I do miss the role you used to play. The role where somebody told me they loved me and I believed it, and I them. I miss having someone to share my life with, both the joys and sorrows.

I neither wish you the best or the worst. I simply wish for the scars to thaw so I may have love to give again in the ways that used to flow so naturally.

I would say bye but that happened some time ago. May our paths remain divergent little one, only crossing in the safety of dreams

Yours no more, P