Breaking up with girlfriend but she has no where to go gf 28F me 29M

My girlfriend 28F me 29M lives with me together at my house, have been together for about a year maybe 1.5 on and off, lived with me for a year, I own a family members house that passed away it’s great but I’d rather them still be here, anyways it’s just not working she’s really emotional and I’m just not, I struggle to feel emotions tend to push it off and resort to drug use not in an abusive way but more ill abuse myself I’m not perfect I know maybe has something to do with the fact I was left by my drug addicted abusive parents when I was a child in a hotel room and found by the cleaners and been with my grandparents ever since anyways was a tough childhood to say the lest but I know other people had it worse a lot worse, parents were young some things happened to my mother iv grown to understand the situation and am 29 now around 22 I met my mother for the first time since and only memory of her besides some pretty traumatic child stuff I just realised I don’t even need a mum now the feeling of disconnect from childhood just made it go away, you can’t miss someone who was just never there she was still doing terrible and I was doing a lot better by myself my grandparents support me through and through, my drug problem has been finshed with the last year nearly, quit smoking weed every day since 22 the last month, sunk 16k into a window cleaning business during winter things are stressful to say the lest, my gf just took off over the weekend to her sisters, I bought a ball of speed and smoked it all weekend instead of dealing with the root issue of us always butting heads yeah I know stupid, she truely loves me and accepts me but at the same time says my excuse of that not having a ‘mothers touch’ is affecting her, I don’t like to cuddle honestly I hate to be touched my skin crawls, my love for her has been fading money is low it’s expensive in Aus right now and she wants a family with me, i do not want to bring children into this and have to pay for child support/ be a broken family, step kids ect that’s what my child hood was I just want out when she came back Monday today I told her this we are breaking up, she’s so upset, blaming me for leaving her with nothing she has no where to go, her sister is moving over seas due to her moving out and her friends are back in her home town a state over, her jobs 30 mins from my house that she changed too, she has no money, I told her she can stay in the spare room rent free as she hasn’t ever paid rent or bills, iv never asked, till she figures things out, I know this isn’t a great idea she says I don’t care but if I didn’t I’d tell her to pack her stuff and kick rocks I’m not an asshole I just don’t do feelings and when people cry I instantly walk the other way it freaks me out, I know she’s going to try fix things but it’s just not fixable I want out I told her I do not love her but she still cooked and cleaned tonight yeh I get it I’m a dick but atlest im honest, i just want to be alone guess this is a vent i need to stick to my words i think she needs to work on being able to be alone with herself too iv been sleeping in the lounge for most of the relationship, im not gay (nothing wrong with that) but just hate sharing a bed with a women and like my own space I mentioned having separate bed rooms as that’s how my grandparents were since growing up just made sense, she’s not impressed ever with that idea idk venting

Am i insane ?