MSDS idea for magic items

Making a catalog of all the discount magic items in my PC's shop, and had an idea of using a fantasy version of the MSDS diamond for each item. Open to your ideas.

Diamond

• Health Hazard: No change
• Reactivity Hazard
  • 4 - Using may likely shatter dimensional planes
  • 3 - Explosion imminent
  • 2 - Destroys all within its path
  • 1 - Violent reaction with organic matter
• 0 - Stable-ish
• Environmental Hazard
• 5 - Necrotic/Undead. Death or Death-like symptoms
• 4 - Mental/Psychic damage. Insanity may occur
• 3 - Poison/Acid. Check with your local Alchemist
• 2 - Elemental hazard. Pick your weakness
• 1 - Force/Cutting/Striking. May punch you in the face
• 0 - Inert
• Special Hazard
• ?

What would be your suggestions/edits? Feel Special Hazard is primed for comedy gold.