AITA for saying that my parents’ comments infantilizing me for my life choices and being disabled were demeaning and hurtful?

My parents are small business owners. When I (25f) was in high school and community college I used to work there and after college I started working an hour a week doing payroll stuff for them and sometimes cashiering on weekends. I have been helping a lot this summer because one employee, Haley (25f) went on maternity leave for her second child. I don't dislike Haley but I feel jealous of her because when Haley and her husband had her first baby 5 years ago I was still working there and they threw her a baby shower at work but didn't do anything for my associates degree graduation that year and said it wasn't work related even though having a baby isn't work related either.

I have multiple severe mental illnesses and wasn't able to handle the same courseload/work hours as my peers. I finished a degree as a part time student while working and graduated at 24, then I became a substitute teacher with other special needs kids.

When I was around 20 several "aunties" (not biologically related but like family) brought up the topic of permanent birth control because they knew that I wanted to get married in the future but wasn't stable enough to parent. It was a pretty straightforward decision since I had an inheritable disability and I had been living with eating disorders since I was 6 and was worried about malnutrition related birth defects, but said that I felt I was too young to do anything irreversible at the time. I scheduled it last year and the operation took place a week after my 25th birthday. I'm not married yet but in a new relationship and am happy being childfree but not happy with the demeaning comments from my parents.

I was visiting my parents for the 4th of July weekend. They said that I was just a baby compared to all the other employees. I said that Haley is my age so we are both babies.

They immediately said "But Haley's different, you're just a kid and she's a married mom of two."

I asked if it would be okay to tell Haley that she's a baby because she never finished a degree. They immediately said "what a cruel thing to say to someone" with horrified looks on their faces.

I said that if it's cruel to call her a baby over something she hasn't accomplished it's equally cruel to say it to me.

They said that they didn't mean it in a hurtful way and I said that they themselves said it was a cruel thing to say and still decided it was ok to say to me. They immediately said that "that's different" and "you wouldn't understand" when I asked how exactly it was different, which seems like a cop out to me.