Why is it so hard making friends.

I literally don’t know what my problem is. Like I already find everything so beyond embarrassing and can’t do basic things in public, but if I make a potential new friend online and they ask to meet up, all of that gets amplified to a million. It’s like I’ve never talked to a human person before in my life and I literally wanna die. What I really don’t get tho, is if I go on a date, I don’t have any of these problems and I’m actually really charming and likeable and outgoing. (and no, it’s not the influence of alcohol because I don’t drink!). like what is the reasoning behind that like why can’t I just treat it like a date but at the same time why is it only on dates that i can function like a normal person but literally not in any other social setting. like I would literally rather burst into flames before asking for a straw at McDonald’s or something, but not on a date like ok.