Streak 5

It’s been a while since I last meditated. I think that the last time I properly meditated was a year ago.  Today, I finally meditated again. It’s not like, “hey I finally meditate again and it felt amazing.” No. It was difficult. In the first minute, my mind felt like it wanted to escape. I felt the urge to reach my phone or distract myself, just so that I wouldn’t have to feel the discomfort I was experiencing.

And that, I realize now that that was the problem. I’ve been feeling something heavy in my heart, something uncomfortable, but I kept running from it. I kept procrastinating, avoiding those feeling by doomscrolling. and I became addicted – not to doomscrolling itself, but to running away from my problems.

I had set up a 10-minute timer to help me resists the urge open my eyes and stop meditating until the notification rang. In the end, I continued until the timer runs out and I felt so much better.