Coping with knowing I’ll never be able to look or dress the way I want due to my body. (MTF)

This is gonna be kinda a long vent, but I don’t really have anyone else in my life right now I can talk to about this without feeling like a burden.

For context; i’m a 16 year old pre everything (and not out, will be by the end of this week since i’m finally getting my shit together, should be able to start hrt before my 17th birthday in january next year) trans girl with VERY broad shoulders. I look like a troll. I’m 5’5, and have about 16-18 inch shoulders and a super broad ribcage. It’s all bone as well (at least at the top of my shoulders, my arms are a bit fatty) so it’s not like HRT will do much in that regard. I feel like I’ve been set up to fail in every aspect in terms of my transition. I have a broad build, lots of body hair, and my hair might be thinning. I have a really feminine face but other than that I feel like there’s literally nothing else that could be worse. I just want to have the body of a woman, not some wide built guy. I wish I could wear pretty clothing that looked good on my body, I wish I wasn’t destined to always look so broad, I wish my body shape actually could be salvaged via HRT but it just can’t. I hate knowing I’ll never be comfortable in my own skin, or feel at least somewhat happy about myself. I just wanna curl up into a ball and cry all the time these days.

I’ve never seen a cis woman that looks like me or has the same body shape as me, and that just gives me another layer of hopelessness. I don’t know how to cope with this. Even when I start HRT, hopefully young, it won’t do anything to fix the damage done to my shoulder width by puberty. I want to be slim and feminine, not whatever I am or will be. I just don’t know what to do.

Sorry about this being a bit long.