Exhausted

I always feel like I’m supposed to prepare things before I choose to kill myself. I already feel selfish that I want to take my own life but leaving without preparing anything seems even more selfish, knowing my loved ones are going to have to figure out what to do with all my things. Packing up the life I didn’t want seems so cruel to do to them. But I just want to give up and let go. I’m so tired all the time. I can’t keep fighting.