1/2 Sibling

Hi- I found out very out of the blue that my mom had a baby in the 1960s. She gave the baby up for adoption and married my dad not long after. The baby was not his and i am not sure that he knows about the baby.

I have a relationship with my sibling, i have told them everything i know about health, family, etc. I have not told my mom that i know because of my dad and the unknown part of that story. Nor have i shared with my relatives or siblings. Friends and my immediate family know, my spouse and kids.

I am struggling with this secret and my mom knowing that this could crop up. I wonder if anyone else has been in this situation and has thoughts about it.

I don’t blame my mom and i sure feel awful for my 1/2 sibling. Overall adoption is a tough situation and not as it’s been painted for years by people. But i also don’t love the weight of this secret.

I started therapy — which is ok but not sure the therapist understands my struggles with this. And i have read stories from the adoptee side but none really about siblings who have been connected with and holding family secrets.

If you got this far- thanks! I welcome thoughts from everyone!