Kratom felt so good and now i wanna go back

I am clean about 18 days cold turkey and lately i sm having these cravings. I drink alcohol in a big chunk because kratom gave me so much energy and mindset that there isnt a way for me to stas sober.

Thinking abour taking a another dose is a routine for me every day and i am doing great bit not much progress because instead drinking alone at home and becoming an addict. As iam a addict of many kinds kratom was a really great way to disconnecr from the world and not really think about all the bad things that happened. Taking another dose would ser me to the start of taking 25 grams of powder at the same time of each start of the day but i dont really feel there is another way to feel good again.

When i stopped taking kratom i have become very antisocial. I have been drinking every other day becaude being sober 2 days plus had my emotions driving crazy. I dont want anyone to go back but i am so sad and washed up i feel like. Is there a sober way for any of you? I mean how csn xou manage to have a good life without kratom i feel like its unpossible?