Ai Higuchi’s “Monologue Trilogy” — Exploring Inner Loneliness and Modern Disconnect

Starting this July, Ai Higuchi will release a three-part series called the “Monologue Trilogy” over three consecutive months. The first installment, “Aging (エイジング)”, marks a rare departure from commercial tie-ins. It's a song Higuchi wrote by facing herself honestly. Both the lyrics and melody feel like a quiet, sharp, and tender soliloquy. This series, weaving emotions too big for a single song into three fragments, deeply reflects her current state of mind.

Real Sound is running a special interview series exploring this trilogy. In this first session, Higuchi talks about the theme of "aging," the importance of intergenerational dialogue, the dangers of mental “echo chambers” caused by isolation, and her yearning not to "save someone" but simply to "understand."

Higuchi gazes at the loneliness within herself and the isolation hidden inside others. Her monologues, gently touching those contours, continue to reach the hearts of listeners.
—Takakuni Kuroda
Realizing a Shift in Values — Still Wanting to "Keep Trying, Even if It Hurts"

—Why did you decide to release a trilogy this time?
Higuchi: Honestly, I just had this strong feeling that I needed to write songs purely for myself again. Lately, I’d been doing a lot of tie-in songs, and personal writing kept getting pushed back. Making it a “trilogy” felt like forcing myself to write three songs, like setting a deadline with structure. That’s how the idea came about.

—Why call it the “Monologue Trilogy”? What does that mean to you?
Higuchi: Part of it is... kind of like an escape clause. By calling it a “monologue,” I could take the stance of “I’m just talking to myself.” It’s similar to how people tweet on X (formerly Twitter): “This is just me thinking out loud, but I wonder how many people will like it?” [laughs]

It also reflects things I’ve felt over the past few years — not just about me, but also what my friends are going through. Stuff like: “My subordinate’s older than me but doesn’t do anything,” or “The younger ones only do what they're told,” or “I don't even know how to interact with people anymore.”

—You’ve reached an age where you're in that in-between position.
Higuchi: Exactly. If an older colleague says, “I wish you’d try a little harder,” some younger people might see that as harassment. Then I start wondering: Are our values already outdated? But at the same time, it’s not easy to discard the values we’ve grown up with. And yet, I start to wonder: If trying hard has meaning to us, what does life look like for those who can’t or won’t try hard anymore?

I remember going to get my lashes and nails done two or three years ago. The girl doing them was in her mid-20s. I casually asked, “Do you have any dreams for the future?” and she said something like, “As long as I can have fun drinking with friends, I don’t care if I don’t earn a lot. Just kind of floating through life is fine.”
I had no idea what to say.
That moment made me think: “Wait, am I becoming the minority now?” That realization of a value shift is probably what triggered this song.
Expressing Harsh Truths in Lyrics — A Reflection of Real-World Frustrations

—Lines like “I want to defend the ones accused of harassment” and “I want to punch the ones who won’t work” are pretty provocative.
Higuchi: I know, right? [laughs] But if you’ve ever made something from scratch, you know that sometimes, you can’t just quit or go to sleep. My life doesn’t follow regular hours — I often text friends at 2 or 3 a.m., even though I add, “Don’t reply, just writing this to remember.” But even that might feel like pressure to some.

—There’s a tough balance to strike.
Higuchi: Right. But deep down, I still believe life is more fun when you try hard. Work takes up most of your life — wouldn’t it be nice if people could feel like “trying is actually kind of fun”? I don’t want to force that on anyone, but I do hope it resonates.
That kind of inner conflict — which I think a lot of people our age share — is what I tried to capture in this song.
“I Understand, But I Don’t Accept” — Emotional Nuance in an Overexposed World

—The lines “I understand, but I don’t accept” and “I nod, but I don’t agree” really stood out.
Higuchi: Like when a scandal breaks out on social media and someone rushes to apologize — the person who speaks first is often seen as the “right” one. Even if the truth is more complex, once the narrative is set, it’s hard to shift.
I think it’s amazing that people who once had no voice now have one. But at the same time, it’s also scary.

—You don’t seem to face much backlash for your music though.
Higuchi: Yeah, I guess since it’s “art,” it gets more leeway. I think that’s how it should be. If we lose that freedom of expression, we’re stuck with empty words like “cute,” “awesome,” or “let’s do our best.”

—Do you think it’s possible to express anything without hurting someone?
Higuchi: Probably not. And sometimes even things labeled “anti-mainstream” become the new norm. I think we’re right at that tipping point now — a reversal is coming.
The chorus line “Even flaunted glory must fade” reflects that. I’m still “greedy” for meaning. Even if it’s just a leftover ember of old passion, I want to carry it forward.
The Importance of Knowing What You Love — Not What Others Tell You to Love

—The line “Before I knew it, I wasn't human anymore,” versus “You think ‘this isn’t human’” — can we ever really understand each other?
Higuchi: That lyric is exactly about that disconnection. Love too — we fall for someone because we don’t understand them. But without a base of affection, that effort to understand collapses.

I think a lot of people can’t even feel “love” anymore. On my radio show, I get so many messages saying, “I just can’t fall for anyone.”
Social media floods us with so much noise that we start to doubt our feelings. “Is this real?” “Should I feel this way?” It all becomes diluted.

—Do you understand your own feelings clearly?
Higuchi: Not always “precisely,” but I try to. When I was around 22, I told someone, “I have no individuality.”
They said, “Your individuality is in what you love. Try listing what you genuinely like.”
Until then, I hadn’t really thought about that. But when I started listing what I enjoy — like eating, or things I lose track of time doing — I discovered what truly stuck with me. And that helped me understand myself.

—The self who feels “this is what I love” is your real self?
Higuchi: Yeah. Those things that excite me even when I’m alone — I don’t want to share them, because people will say “I know more about that than you,” or “That’s boring.” I want to protect those things.
Rediscovering Yourself in a Hyperconnected World

—Seeing too much online makes you unsure what you actually like, right?
Higuchi: Totally. You get pulled toward what’s “safe,” what won’t get criticized. But that’s an emotionless zone. I want people to find things they love so much they don’t even want to share them.

—Noticing what you don’t like is important too, right?
Higuchi: Absolutely. But sometimes we find ourselves doing things we hate, and then we start to hate ourselves.
You need space to reconnect with yourself — but social media eats away that space. You get swept up in others’ opinions before you even register your own.

It’s exhausting, but I think it's worth having “knowledge just for yourself” — things you alone enjoy. That sharpens your emotional sensitivity over time. You start being able to clearly feel “I don’t like this person,” or “Maybe they didn’t mean any harm.”
On Society, Isolation, and Staying Flexible

—What kind of relationship do you have with society now?
Higuchi: My stance hasn’t changed: I want to protect the people I care about.
I think peace starts small — by helping those around you. And I think what really matters is not letting people become isolated.

When we start disliking people, we often don’t realize we’re the ones doing the disliking. Once that sets in, it’s hard to escape. You lose flexibility in your thinking.

—Almost like falling into conspiracy theories?
Higuchi: Exactly. When your internal frustrations match up with something you read, it feels like truth. And without talking to others, that belief just snowballs.
I’ve been there myself — felt my thoughts hardening. It scared me.

I started meeting people again. Even if I didn’t talk much — just listening to someone worry about their love life helped me think, “Oh, it’s okay to struggle.”

You realize there’s life beyond the little box you built for yourself. That’s how you expand.
In the end, meeting people really is important.

ヒグチアイ“独り言”三部作「エイジング」インタビュー：変化する価値観に戸惑いながらも見つけた私なりの答え