What's sometimes misunderstood about dead bedrooms

I'm a HL married dad in a long term dead bedroom. What's often misunderstood by well meaning people who give advice such as counseling, communication, different things to try etc. Is that sometimes the low libido side of things (in this case my wife) fundamentally relates to pleasure, enjoyment in an entirely different manner. Simply said, somewhere along the line they lose the ability to enjoy giving and receiving pleasure, happiness, joy the same way what we might consider a healthy person might. This can be even seen in examples outside of sex like food, doing fun things together and just generally enjoying simple things. It's a deep issue usually related to things outside the marriage. It's not even intentional. Some people are just wired different which makes traditional solutions pretty much off the table.