My girlfriend (26f) got angry that I (29m) didn’t cook dinner despite her not actually saying she wanted anything

I work from home most of the time while my girlfriend works in an office. Normally for food we'll wait until she is back to decide what to eat and then we'll cook together or I'll cook it. She suffers from depression and has been feeling low recently.

Normally when she's feeling low she's pretty much say no to every meal option until it's later and will either suggest ordering food or find something we have in that she doesn't mind eating.

Yesterday she got in from work and was in a bad mood and feeling low. She went into the bedroom and just wouldn't' talk.

She then went to sleep. She woke up around 8pm. She then started talking about how things weren't working with us.

We had this conversation on Saturday and both agreed on things we need to do to work on the relationship.

I told her we'd already discussed this and to stop bringing it up whenever she feels bad since she's not even giving us a chance to work through things.

She pointed out she was sat here hungry and I hadn't even cooked us anything. I told her that I'm not a mind reader and she should have said if she wanted something to eat.

I said that she usually refuses anything anyway when she's feeling like this so I wasn't just going to waste food.

I said it looks like whenever she's in a bad mood she'll go out of her way to make sure I end up feeling shit too and it needs to stop.

I said I'm not just going to cook her food because she decided I should without even bothering to communicate it to me.

How would you handle this?

Tl;dr my girlfriend has started taking her low moods out on me. She’ll sit in the bedroom refusing to talk then when she does she’ll just complain and say things aren’t working. Last night she got annoyed tvat i hadn’t cooked dinner despite her just going straight into the bedroom and not even mentioning she was hungry.

Posted Jul 17, 2025, 8:45 AM UTC

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