Suspect of IVDD

Hi fellow Frenchie lovers! Seeking advice/recommendations/need to vent about my 3 year old boy’s suspected IVDD from/to people who understand and relate to the emotional and physical magnitude of how hard it really is. Overview of how our week has looked:

• I was out of town last week so he stayed at my mom’s house where rules are limited and there’s lots of activity (much bigger house and yard than mine.) He loves it over there because of that, however on my way to pick him up Sunday my mom called me and said she thought something might be wrong with Bugg because he wasn’t following her or going up the stairs. Luckily I was about 5 minutes out and we were on the way home shortly after pick up. I regularly travel for work and my mom watches him so it’s not unusual for him to come home exhausted or sore from the increase in activity.
• Upon returning home, he was still off and now looking back definitely trying to tell me something was wrong. He ended up falling asleep so I let him rest and figured that’s what he needed. At this point he was still walking normally, jumping on and off the couch, eating and drinking water etc
• He woke up around 10 and we went outside to potty (he was asleep for about 4 hours,) walked normally outside but when we came back inside his back legs were stumbling/slightly dragging and he started heavily panting. I took him to the emergency vet where he walked in and then eventually walked out with a diagnosis of “lumbar back pain - suspect IVDD”
• He is now on 2 weeks of strict kennel rest, Gabapentin, Prednisone and Trazodone.
• Monday was horrible. During the day he was in a lot of pain and would yelp when readjusting himself, was reluctant to lay down, had a panting attack which I was able to soothe by wrapping his ears and paws in a cool damp rag. That night was similar to Sunday as far as timing but his condition worsened. He was totally unable to use his back legs, panting, screaming in pain and a few other grueling details which was traumatizing. I rushed him back to the e-vet where he was completely fine upon arrival. Like walking better than the day before and acting totally normal. They sent us home.
• The rest of the week has gone really well. He was quick to start using the ramp I bought for the steps outside (there are three that have very little incline, I carried him before the ramp got here,) using the bathroom normally, eating and drinking water, walking (even trying to run, pulling on the leash, lifting his leg.) He is acting like himself and I can feel his energy shift from fear to now boredom (crate rest probs)

Although he’s doing much better - I can’t help but to feel overwhelmingly guilty, paranoid, stressed and despair. I have tried to enforce minimal stress on his back his whole life but there are times I’d just given up because he jumps over ramps/stairs, likes to zoom and play rough, moves or jumps over gates to follow me, basically he’s a kangaroo in a frenchie body. When he’s at my mom’s there’s no telling what he’s jumping off of or over. Part of me is glad he is happy and loves his life because he’s having fun, but the other part is telling me I should’ve been more disciplined as it was not worth his now suffering. This week has been one of the hardest to navigate and live through. He is not allowed to have any visitors so I’ve been doing this all alone, and as I try to explain his condition to my close circle I know they will never understand because they will never have to witness or hear the amount of pain he was in. It’s been heart breaking. The bad parts replay in my mind all day and it makes it hard to appreciate the good times. There hasn’t been a second that I haven’t wanted to go back in time and be better about preventative measures or taking him in sooner to get the pain under control. I was in denial on Sunday but now accepting that our lives are going to significantly change and things will never be the same.

Bugg and I are learning together and have formed a great routine together and his recovery has been a dream compared to other stories I’ve read so I’m grateful. I crate trained him as a puppy and he’s always been a dog that loves being in it so crate rest has been easy and I think he likes the rest. I’ve also kept the house quiet, cool and dark so he gets optimal and quality sleep. Walking only to go potty outside. I’ve been following the vets instructions to a tee. 24/7 monitoring and analyzing every sound and move is a task I’ve given myself.

Part of me feels bad if I’m not downstairs with him 100% of the time. Part of me also feels bad that he’s bored. I don’t want him to feel lonely or isolated when I am the one that ultimately contributed to the reason he’s in there in the first place. But he is doing better, not 100% but pretty close so I know it’s necessary.

This post turned out to be longer than I thought it would but I guess I’m just craving relatability and answers. How do I stop worrying about every move he makes being a potential tweak? Will I ever be able to let him free roam when I’m not here and not watching him? Is he mad at me for keeping him in the crate? Is he blaming me for his pain? How can I keep my mom from feeling guilty? Will I ever consider letting him go back over there? Should I just keep him bubble wrapped for the rest of his life so nothing ever happens to him?

As far as lifestyle changes - any recommendations on sturdy ramps for my bed and couch would be much appreciated. What should I do about the stairs? Has anyone found a solution other than carrying their baby or keeping them downstairs? Is there anyone out there with a successful healing story without surgery? Is this even IVDD since it wasn’t technically diagnosed and no MRI confirmation? Should I do the MRI? Are there any life hacks for prevention anyone’s done? Anyone with a similar story?

If nothing else comes from this long post, I hope at least one person reads this and feels comforted in the fact that they’re not alone, they’re not crazy, and there’s someone out there that knows how hard it is. I’m finally starting to feel like there’s hope on the horizon. Be patient, trust the process, be aware and cautious.

And if you made it this far, I appreciate your time more than you’ll ever know. We are lucky it wasn’t worse and sympathize with the cases that are more severe. I can’t imagine what yall have gone through. Wishing endless health and happiness to my frenchie community. Hope to update this at some point with good news 🫶