those who are childfree but still feel 'motherly instincts', what are your reasons/experiences?

I feel like most of the content I see on this sub-reddit is about people who have been sure of their choice for many years in an absolutist way. so, I wanted to know if there is anybody, who is childfree, but less from an instinctual 'i dont like children' perspective, but more so from a 'pros and cons' perspective.

I've been thinking about being childfree, but my reasons are principally 1) way less financial stress 2) peace of mind 3) (hopefully) less strain on relationships 4) ability to travel more. IE. pragmatic

Rationally I know being childfree is the best choice for me, but in my heart I still have 'mother instincts' and when I see a baby I find it soo cute and want one of my own. but i KNOW it will bring me turmoil in the moment simply because parenthood is HARD.

Also, one of my concerns is like, what If i'm not able to foster a tight knit community through lifelong friendship w other childfree people (which is basically my plan instead of having kids) -- especially bc I feel like society really diminishes the impact of friendships on quality of life, viewing it as way less fulfilling than family. -- WILL I BE LONELY! (tho I find my inability to be alone to be a trait I really don't like about myself anyways)