Silently Competitive Friendship

I (F25) have been friends with another girl, Bailey, (F25) since we started law school together a couple years ago. She was one of my best friends, but over the past year, I’ve felt like there’s an unspoken comparison happening from her end.

During 1L, I started working at a really small firm and absolutely loved it. I’d tell my friends I could see myself there and they only do litigation, which is what I’ve always wanted to do. Bailey actually met one of the attorneys at the same time I did a few years ago, so when she said she applied there for the following summer, I figured it was likely bc I spoke highly of it and she had met one of the attorneys before. However, Bailey would always talk down on litigation any time I said that’s what I wanted to do and that she only wants to do transactional law. Still, I didn’t think much of her applying at the firm at the time and I actually hyped her up a lot to the partners when they’d ask about candidates, and she ended up getting the job. I was really happy for her at the time, but now that I’ve picked up on some competition vibes from her, I’m in a bad place.

Now, any time she talks about the firm to our mutual friends, she won’t make eye contact with me and will go on about how much they love her and how close she is to all of them. It’s not easy to describe in words, but it comes off like she’s trying to one-up me and almost “prove” she’s better than me. She doesn’t know that I got an offer there, but I’m scared to even say anything because I feel like she will be put off by it. I love this firm and I have another firm I’m at rn too that I also love, but I’m stuck deciding between both. I’m fearful that if I go back to the one Bailey is at rn that competition will only fester more.

This is not the only instance I’ve felt competition or comparison from her. I introduced her to sculpt because I’ve been going for a while and thought it’d be a way to reconnect when I’ve been feeling distance. After one class, she said she wanted to get a membership at my studio and has been posting on social media about going to hot yoga/introducing her bf to it when I literally just introduced her one week ago. She doesn’t interact with my TikTok while she posts all the time and likes/comments on her friends’ posts. Her boyfriend has complimented me before and she goes silent, but when he compliments another friend, she’ll hype them up. She makes plans in front of me when she knows I won’t be able to make it. The list goes on. I don’t know how to handle this when we’re in the same friend group and potentially going to work at the same firm. Any advice would be appreciated.