I love my husband but his family is massively a holes. I've made posts about my SIL and nephew before on here and my husband has finally agreed that our kids should not be around him as it's only a matter of time before he severely hurts one of them. FIL is a workaholic who seems to think our relationship with him should be me reaching out to him. Including going up to their bedroom to say hi and bye as it's to hard to actually sit and eat at the table with the rest of the family. MIL at this point I believe is a functioning alcoholic with a gambling and spending problem, who is also a hoarder. 

Given all that, that isn't even the worst. They will guilt trip you, call you names and try to tear you down when things don't go their way. I met my husband when he was about to graduate high school and MIL would call him pathetic, useless, a p.o.s and more. Husband is almost 30 and is afraid to call out of work for fear of his mom finding out and ripping into him over it. We even got ripped into one year because we didn't get a card for them for their wedding anniversary. She went on saying we didn't care and it's less then $5 why couldn't we have gotten a card and how hurt she was and that it was pathetic and a sorry excuse. 

The big one that sticks with me was we had our first born in early 2022 so covid restrictions. They decided for FIL's birthday they were going to travel across the country via plane and then go to a packed bar and celebrate. Which fine but given that we were going to have them wait a week after they get back before they met our baby if I went into labor while they were gone or shorty after they got back Which I did. They didn't like they couldn't visit in the hospital but understood but the day we got home was chaos. I will never forgive them for what they said and how they made us feel because we wanted them to wait another 24 hours for safety. FIL said covid was fake and we were being ridiculous and how dare we not let them see their first grandchild because they decided to go on a trip. MIL was crying and went off and couldn't believe our dog got to meet the baby before them and on the way home from the hospital we should have stopped by their house and hung out for a bit. 

FIL isn't much better when he does decided to actually communicate with people. The image attached is the text he sent my husband and SIL on my second mother's day and SIL's first. SIL had a one week old and I was 5 months pregnant with a 1 year old. Mothers day fell on a Sunday but due to work we were going to celebrate on a saterday. Well Friday night MIL calls and invites us over to eat for saterday of course husband said yes and thus canceling our plans for us to go out and eat so I'm upset. Well saterday afternoon husband calls to find out time we should head over and she canceled on us. So obviously we went back to our original plans as we aren't going to play these games with them. Thus FIL sent that text that night because instead of communicating like an adult she had a tantrum. It's also not my fault that her own husband literally says "you aren't my mother so why should I celebrate you." 

Just yesterday MIL decided to go off on my husband again because my car is having issues and we asked for help to run the code on it to see what it could be. Well I guess we are ungrateful because we asked for help and didn't offer to make them dinner or give them money when in all honesty they actually owe us a couple hundred as we paid to keep their electric on for them twice. 

Husband and I are over it and it's not our fault she chooses to stay up until 6am and then have obligations at 11:30am to watch her hell spawn of a grandson. We called at 3pm to let her know what was happening and we got told off for it. Husband was the one having issues making a distance but I think he finally sees how unhealthy his family really is and can't wait until he turns out in his program to move states to get away from them but also be in a better city for our kids.

Husband has finally admitted his family is a problem and we should put space between us and them.