If you are going through a mental downturn in your life, how do you manage to stay mindful of the emotional and mental labor of your relationship instead of retreating into one's own bubble and shutting everything out?

Is emotional and mental labor like the desire to maintain a strong connection in a relationship while managing everyday responsibilities? For me personally, as it relates to my mental faculties, I just have to go into my own bubble when something feels too overwhelming or out of my capacity. I just don't see the point of bringing someone into your bubble when you are not in a good place mentally. But from your experience do men just become more avoidant of the emotional and mental labor and check out of the relationship over time? If the emotional intelligence, comfort and understanding isn't fully matured, what do women at least want to see at a minimum? Just not to go out of our way to be avoidant of these aspects and be more proactive? Not fully shut you out over an extended period of time?

I am wondering too how does it make a woman feel when you give of the impression that you only want to focus on a relationship when it is mentally convenient for that person? I get the feeling women feel like they have to manage alot more sh** mentally and physically and are still expected to fulfill all these duties/responsibilities. So why should they be open to be accepting of a man's cop out(s), does that sound right?