I feel awful for possibly giving my girlfriend HSV-1, even though I was honest about having it.

Early on, I told her I had HSV-1. I even showed her my test results and explained that it’s super common. I genuinely thought it was mostly oral and not that serious. I didn’t know it could show up genitally or be this severe. i never have shown any symptoms but I have had it since I was a children, I still told her I had it although I down play the severity, I feel the society has made this disease feel like is not a big deal. My girlfriend had a extreme outbreak from this, and it is my fault, for downplaying it, I am 25 and she is 22, neither of us knew what we where getting into, I feel for her.

She never said she was negative, and she still agreed to be intimate. She got tested 8 days after we were together and it came back negative, even though she had already shown symptoms, it seems like that first test was just too early. So I’m pretty sure it was me who gave it to her.

I feel like absolute trash. If I had known HSV-1 could be passed like this, I would’ve ended things to protect her. Now, because of me, she might have this virus for life.

I know I was honest and she had a choice, but the guilt is eating me alive. How do you cope with something like this?