How do I trust my dad?- trigger warning addiction

I’ve had several father figures in my life that were all very abusive and I felt like I was always in danger from age 7 to 18 and had my life threatened multiple times and due to this I have a lot of trouble trusting my real father even tho he has always been really good to me. I want to go camping with him tomorrow but recently I’ve had to talk about my trauma and past life events a lot at work and did annual narcan training that brought back flashbacks of my mom having an od and my step father at the time was going to let her die and due to talking about my past and the flashbacks during the training I’ve had really bad anxiety all day and thought I was going to have a full blown panic attack for the first time in over a year today and with me actively having this attack I’m irrationally worried that my dad might do something to harm me while camping and it’s making me wanting to just tell him I’m not going and go alone but I don’t get to spend a lot of time with him and want him to go. How do I even cope with this because I’m really struggling rn and what should I do?