Coyote problems?

Hi there, I'm a concerned individual with three kids. I have recently moved into the city with my partner and I have noticed some serious issues with coyotes.

• People have their dogs out like, all the time. Aren't there leash laws? What the hell is that about? Look, pal, I don't like you, you don't like me, but you just get left food and clean water in bowls like you're the Queen of France and I'm tired of drinking from the sewer runoff. Maybe you dial it back some and be a good neighbor from your castle, asshole?

• My kids are terrified. Everything is too noisy. Cars, planes, construction, the nightlife, turn it all the way down from the hours of 11:00 PM to 11:00 PM the following day and just start it over. Just quiet down. I think the fat one of my kids is deaf because of some unnatural explosion in the sky a few weeks ago. How's he supposed to survive in a world like this? Why are you setting off explosions in the air?

• Too many cars. Enough said, need I say more? r/fuckcars.

• Please stop taking photos of me and my family for your Instabook or Facespace or whatever. I have no idea how you're posting photos of us online and I assume it's something related to those black rectangles that are constantly in your hands. It scares the shit out of me and I always briefly think there's another me trapped in there.

• The restaurants here don't just dump expired food outside on the ground like they do in Oakland. It's uncivilized the way you do things. Be better.

The abundance of cats and small dogs with careless owners is totally fine, though. I'm absolutely loving the city and plan on having kids here again next year if I'm not hit by a delivery truck.

Thanks for your time!