feeling alone and suicidal today.

im not even progressing in my life, im SO alone 24/7, i have barely anyone anymore, struggling with several different mental illnesses on top of this makes it even harder, i feel nobody truly understands me, i dont even understand myself at this point, i feel my life is completely pointless, ive heard "it gets better" for so long, but i feel thats all a lie now lol, i just wish i could feel normal and i was doing so good staying clean from self harm but thats long gone now