I feel so broken and crazy

Not trying to sound dramatic - I haven’t even thought of this disorder for a long time because it’s just because part of daily life for me.

Sometimes when it hits me though, like right now, I feel so ashamed. So wrong, so “crazy” and “mad” for repeating sounds for myself when I hear someone else make it. I’m sitting in my living room and can hear my brother make a noise from upstairs and I sit by myself and repeat it.

What even is this shitty disorder? Literally it’s torture and nobody even knows of it. It’s like we’re meant and cursed to carry this shame and struggle with us silently, always causing trouble and keeping it locked up inside.

Idk what the point of this post is, I just know this: if anyone is feeling the same, you are NOT alone. I feel you. And I’m sorry we’re going through this.