AITAH? Pregnancy announcement.

I'm looking for some outside opinions and insight. Was there something I could have done better or was I right to feel the way I did? This might be long, please bear with me.

I (37F) held in my pregnancy news for a few weeks. My husband (38M) and I decided to post a fun, hinted announcement on FB for our 11th anniversary to see who would catch it first. The announcement was this:

"🥂🍼🍾 Happy 11th Anniversary to my incredible husband! My heart swells thinking about all we've built and the incredible journey we've been on for the last decade. You are the anchor that keeps me grounded, the humor that brightens my every day, and the most loving, devoted father a child could ask for. You are my truest love and best friend. As we mark just over a decade of marriage, it seems the sequel to our greatest adventure is currently in production. My love for you grows with every passing year. Cheers to our beautiful family and the many more chapters to come. Here's to forever and always, my love. 🥂🍼🍾"

My husband and his sister ((SIL)34F) have been in a spat, but it was just sibling stuff. I came home and told my husband I saw a notification that she liked the post, but it was gone from my list. My husband decided she had seen it and texted his dad (60ishM) the news, since he doesn't use FB. I then received the attached messages from my SIL, and I responded.

"SIL: Kinda hurtful you didnt message me.

Me: Huh? About the status? I thought it was a funny way to announce it, I didn't tell anyone. (Husband) knew, he didn't say anytning either. He told your dad only after I made the post because dad doesn't use FB.

SIL: Nope no one told me anything. And ya kinda hurtful. Have a great day

Me: Wait, what? I'm confused as fuc* right now. Are you mad at me for not telling you? I didn't tell ANYONE expect my mom because I needed her to take me to my appointments already lol. I made a FB post about our anniversary today and put in it a subtle hint that I am pregnant.My own family is finding out exactly like everyone else. My brother still doesn't know cus he rarely uses FB. Not my aunt, or uncle, no one. Hell, my grandma just found out and she lives with us. I thought it would be a fun way of announcing it. It wasn't meant to be hurtful. And, honestly, how the fuck was I supposed to think you even wanted to talk to me, when you and (husband) have been fighting and I keep telling him I don't want anything to do with it. He didn't even want to tell your dad about it until after I read the post I made to him. He then said he was going to text (dad) because he doesn't use FB. Like, I just don't understand how this is on me, when your brother could have said something to you, but he knew I wasn't even telling my family.

SIL: Like I said have a great day. He couldve you could've.

Me: I cannot even do this right now. This is actually insane. I don't understand. (Husband) is saying that he didn't because you said something about cutting losses and he took it as cutting ties so he didn't think you would care if he tried to tell you.

SIL: Maybe should actually use his head eh. Also btw ive known hiw you think abojt me since you said it to my daughter in 2023.c So once again. Have a good day. Stop messaging me I have 0 interest in any of this. You can tell my r3tard brother that if he messages I'll just be blocking as well.

Me: Lmao how I think about you? What the actual fuc*? Okay, sure. Whatever helps you cope at night I guess. It's cool, I have zero interest in this stress either. Good to know you actually don't want to have a relationship with your niece or the new ONES. He already thought you did block him. So, I guess whatever there too. Take care."

My husband was upset, thinking his sister would likely go to their aunt and uncle, as she has in the past. He sent them the messages she sent me and my responses. The aunt told us SIL claimed it was a "misunderstanding" and she was "just joking." But… where was the joke? I ended up getting upset, and I felt my anniversary and pregnancy announcement was crushed. 

So, Internet strangers, AITH?

Also to add: My husband found out what she thinks I said to her daughter ((N)16F) back in 2023, when she was 13. Her then 8-year-old boy had grabbed a kitchen knife and threatened his sister. My niece was crying, and I tried to calm her down with a joke: "Your brother is gonna grow up to be a serial killer!" We both laughed. What she wasn't told is that I also said, "but you know your mom would never let him actually hurt you, right?" Her response was, "Yes she would, he's her precious baby boy." I smiled and said, "No (N), your brother is much younger than you, he has tons of time to learn, he's still very much maturing. Your parents love you too, but he's a handful and you know it!"

Here's exactly what I said to SIL about that. I don't deny it, but intention matters:

"Now, for the big thing. The thing that I know was thrown at me to hurt me. "How I really feel about you". What is that SIL? Before you even told Husband what is was, I knew exactly what you were gonna say. I will not deny what I ACTUALLY said to N, but the statement of "you're a bad mom" has NEVER left my mouth to your daughter, to your son, to your bother, to NO ONE. Never. And if you took it that way, I am sorry for that. If N said I said that out of anger, I'm sorry for that too. If N took what I said to mean that, I am sorry to both of you for that.

Nephew is gonna grow up to be a serial killer. Yes, I said that, I said that as joke. Why? Because nephew had just threatened, yet again, to st4b N - to k1ll her. She was crying, I was trying to make her laugh, to calm her down. I bet you were never told that I also said, "but you know your mom would never let him actually hurt you, right?" And do you know what her response was? "Yes she would, he's her precious baby boy". I smiled at her and said, "No N, your bother is much younger than you, he has tons of time to learn, he's still very much maturing. Your parents love you too, but he's a handful and you know it!""

She was apparently told I said what I said about the nephew and that I also said she was a bad mom, which I didn't.