Do you feel like you have no identity?

Lately I feel like most humans are the same, and any differences seem superficial. Yes we vary in appearance and interests and personality traits but there are still going to be loads of people who look similar to us and loads of people with the same interests and similar personalities to us.

It makes relationships seem pointless, almost as though I'm just talking to myself. I feel lonely no matter who I'm with.

I'm aware that no one exists to serve me. Everyone's the main character in their own lives.

I think my problem is as children we get told we're important and we become entitled. But I know my feelings aren't REALLY important to anyone - at least, they're certainly no one's priority (nor am I saying they should be) - because I'm the only one who feels them. There's no hidden audience watching my life like it's a movie and cheering me on.

But it makes me feel very alone in my body and in my mind. It really disturbs me how I can never truly know anyone else. How no one else is really "on my side". I look at people and how everyone is just alone in their bodies.

I can't see the point in trying to impress anyone because - they're just another person like me. To have someone love me doesn't mean anything because I'm not really any different to anyone else in any meaningful way. There are countless others they could "love" just as well and love just feels like something you get if you happen to be in right place at the right time. And I know that if I'm too much of a problem, if I don't provide value in their life, they'd be gone. It's never about you. It's about how you make someone else feel.

I can't work out why life is considered worth living; I really can't when so much of it is just work and the mundane. The little pleasures in life seem so tiny and absolutely not worth the effort. i don't care about being "successful"; it seems silly and trivial and so often for someone to win, someone else has to lose.