Rakhi and SILs Kids

So with Rakhi around the corner, I’m feeling a bit conflicted and was wondering how others navigate this.

My SILs expect their kids to tie rakhi to my kids. On paper, it’s sweet, but in reality, I don’t feel close to them, and honestly, it often feels performative. They don’t make an effort with us the rest of the year, barely acknowledge birthdays, and overall give off strong "we're only doing this for tradition/checking a box" energy. It feels forced and awkward.

I’m all for meaningful traditions, but not when they come with double standards or emotional distance. I also don’t want to make a big deal and create drama in the family, especially when kids are involved.

Has anyone else been in this situation? How do you navigate it without looking like the villain? Do you just go along with it for the sake of peace, or is there a way to gently draw some boundaries?

Would love to hear how others have dealt with this, especially in desi families where expectations run high.