AITA for developing confusing feelings toward my guy friend on MDMA while being in a relationship?

I wanna start off by saying that this is not easy for me to share. I have never had any feelings towards him before and everything has always been normal when we are sober. However, confusing things have come to the surface on substances that I need advice on.

Here is a few things that has happened on different occasions that I will keep short.

Kissed the back of my head while I was dancing and when I turned around he was just smiling at me. Would always stay near me at festivals and fan me but not in an obvious way.

Told me he feels like he’s known me all his life and I feel very familiar to him

One time on Acid, while fixing the music.. there were no words exchanged between us just silence and I started to feel this overwhelming tension build between us so I got up and played a track from his phone that was in his hand and his response “you ruined it” I still don’t know what that meant.

While holding his hand to guide him through a crowd once… I felt something more than physical… deeper like a spiritual connection.

He always tells my partner how lucky she is to have found someone like me…

Recently, at the cottage on M we were all hugging each other and being lovey doves as friends do on these things… When were were hugging I tried to pull away but that made him hold onto me even harder and I had to build up my strength to break free from his grip. I had to take a deep breath after and I think he noticed something too.. because has been hot and cold ever sine.. I also catch myself being hot and cold with him now.

I also have caught him looking at me and then he’ll look away when I see catch him.

I have never had any feelings for him before. He’s been in two relationships since I have known him and I adored his exes. They were great women. I still have them on socials. But now my mind is clouded with him.. the things he’s said to me and glances that I have ignored before.. I think we both felt something around the same time.. Which is why he has been hot and cold with and I have found myself do the same. I hate that I have these confusing feelings because I love my partner more than life and I would do anything for them and they were friends with her before I came into the picture.

AITA because i look forward to seeing him constantly. I look forward to how he makes me feel at the same time guilty about it too? Like i'll go out of my way to go somewhere if i know hell be there?