Friend Keeps Crossing Boundaries

My friend came to stay with me for a pre-planned 2 weeks. I was fine with this and even excited because we hadn’t seen each other in person in like two years.

However, I kind of realized how self-unaware he is and how many boundaries he was crossing. He was staying in my family house and would watch our TV, eat our food, and just hang around like he lived there which makes me uncomfortable because my parents are around. It also kind of weirded my dad out.

Towards the end of the 2 weeks, I was obviously sad to see him go but also ready to take a break from hosting and get back to my life. He then delayed his flight three days without asking.

The day he left he was crying and even said that he looked at delaying his flight again but it costed money so he didn’t. I replied with “I wish you could stay but I will not be around really at all next week,” he just replied with “I still would’ve extended it if it didn’t cost money.” That was really shitty to hear. I had been saying for the past few days how I wouldn’t have time to host and I learned then that even that wasn’t a good enough reason to leave, and that he wouldn’t have left if the delaying didn’t cost money. Like a blatant disrespect of my boundaries. He’s planning on coming back for a month this winter and I don’t know how to tell him he can’t.

My dad even said today that he logged into his streaming apps and I don’t even understand how he found the passwords. I’m just scared he will keep ignoring my and my family’s boundaries. My biggest fear is that he’s going to buy a plane ticket to see me for a whole month without even telling or asking me if it’s okay.

I don’t know what to do. I love him and he’s one of my closest friends, but it’s getting to a point where even me saying that I can’t host isn’t a good enough reason for him to not be there, and that he’s using so many of my family’s resources without asking. How do I deal with this? It’s starting to make me anxious and my dad is getting mad at me for my seemingly bad judgement.