Rant: Being expected to work weekends last minute – manager not happy I have a life

Over a month ago, we had a regression testing deadline coming up. My manager reached out to me on Saturday to work on some bugs . I told her I was out of town and couldn’t work — which was true. I’ve got four kids and my weekends are usually packed, especially with no notice.

The following Monday in standup, she brought it up — saying she should have communicated earlier, but also added that she expected the team to step up and work weekends to meet deadlines. I mentioned I wouldn’t be available the coming weekend either if that’s what she was expecting. It was my son’s birthday weekend. They worked til midnight that Saturday.

For context: my manager has always been happy with my work. She’s consistently appreciated my contributions and never had any complaints about my performance. The only “issue” seems to be that I don’t volunteer for extra work. lol. She’s made comments in the past like she wants me to “see the bigger picture” and help other teams.

A couple of weeks ago, she asked if I’d be available the second weekend of September for another deadline. At the time, I said I should be. But since then, my wife made plans for that weekend, so I updated my manager and told her I wouldn’t be available anymore in case she needs people to work.

She wasn’t happy and said something like, “I can’t keep asking the same person to work on weekends,” referring to a coworker who regularly puts in 50–60 hours. I replied, “That’s a personal choice. I already stretch my weekdays beyond 40 hours. I choose to spend weekends with my family. If every release requires weekend work, then we have a process problem.”

Now I’m brushing up my resume. Haven’t interviewed in over 10 years……