How do I regain (or reinvent) what my marriage cost me?

Recently divorced. She fell out of love mainly due to not being able to move on from all the past issues, not all issues were related to me and our relationship i.e. abusive household, abusive ex…

Over a year ago, I started noticing she’s falling out of love, it was so damn hard on me waking up to her face that I love knowing she’s not happy seeing my face first thing in the morning. What did I do? I pushed and pushed, supported her in every way possible, gave her more love, care, and attention than she ever got, in the hope of rekindling what she lost. We tried talking about it a couple of times but I’m not the best with words, my actions were there though.

Bit by bit, I started losing my self, and she noticed that as well, I ignored and kept sacrificing everything that made me, me. She stopped seeing me as a man, she had no respect to who I had to become to help heal her.

Found out she’s been cheating on me for the most part of this year. Came as a shock and a stab in the heart, I hit rock bottom, considered SH, even KMS, took my time, picked myself back up again, gym, sports, new hobbies, therapy, and was able to finally go through 24hours in a day without breaking down in tears.

Now, officially divorced, I don’t feel relief, nor sad, nor regret, nor happy, I actually don’t know how I feel. I know, that I did the right decision, I didn’t just divorce her because she cheated, I divorced her because I realized I need to pick myself first again, after years of not doing that.

My question, it’s been a while now, but I still feel empty inside, went on dates, hookups, nothing helped. How do I regain what I lost? I don’t know who I am without her anymore, I revolved my entire life around some shadow that isn’t there anymore. How do I get my self worth back? My self respect? My self love?