How do you know when it's over?

My husband and I have been having the same fight for our entire marriage (13) years.

He doesn't support me, he doesn't know how to be a team player, and I'm tired.

I'm tired of trying to grow my career and him sabotaging it, while complaining I need to go back to work full time (he has put the dogs in the office when I explicitly explained I have an important Zoom, he's hogged my office for a call when he knows I have a deadline. The last time I had a job interview, I asked him to watch the kids, but he took a nap and the kids kept interrupting my interview, etc.)

He can't cook or clean, and when he does, he messes up. He complains I'm constantly criticizing him, but he can't even clean up the dog's pee without missing 1/2 of it. I'm starting to feel bad for resenting him. When he's around, my entire mood gets affected. I'm quiet, stressed, and annoyed. I don't want to always be annoyed with him, but how can a grown man be so incompetent and lack self-awareness??

He's just so useless to me. I feel like I married Homer Simpson. I wonder if we'd be better off divorced? We don't have sex b/c he's never in the mood, and frankly, I'm not attracted to him, but I do have a high libido. He has awful hygiene and doesn't groom himself.

We went to marriage therapy a couple of times, and it was obvious I'm at my wits' end. I brought up divorce a few times, and he really wants to stay together, and if I were him I would be too. I'm supportive of him and his career. I make sure he comes home to a clean house, a home-cooked meal, and two well-cared-for kids. After 13 years, should I just lower my standards. Should I leave even though he wants to stay together? I can't go on this way.