I never know what to do...

Hey guys. Not the first time here.

The thing is that I'm traumatized after a shitty experience with a group of friends (I'm a male btw.)

Cutting the year length story, it's basically that one of the guys in that group, or maybe them all idk, decided to have a really bully behavior towards me.

From gaslighting and ironize my depression (I have a good condition money wise but a broken family on my back, with basically all of my closest relatives having mental health issues), to possibly spreading something that God knows what around the city.

And hell, I'll have to say it -- I wrote possibly because it's not that clear. I've saw some hints coming from people on X that it might actually relate to me. (Although these people just seem to talk about others anyway.)

Then my paranoia grew stronger. I even thought I could've had been doxxed by someone... and this is the part I don't like to tell but I'll have to.

So, I might fear that they found my reddit account... and by that I mean a certain account which I made a question on a fetishist sub. Ironically, it wasn't for masturbartion purposes, it was just to see how those that were there interact with their fellow fetishist. It's strange and I know that, but it's something that I did a few times with other weird subs.

So idk if that was it, because the crazy coincidences really started about the same time as my post, or if they just created something and spread, or even if I was just paranoid and nothing was spread at all.

---

And now?

I'm about an year now isolated from almost any social interactions. It's really hard.

No going to any public places, especially crowded ones. Not being able to cope with the presence of folks around my age. AND NOT BEING ABLE TO FIND ANY GOOD GIRL FOR ME😭😭 (That I never had btw lol)

I'm seriously stucked inside my house, barely leaving it.

After about an year and half of them sending me down on a paranoia spiral with every way possible, I'm a least mentally stable. No pain anymore. And for that I'm glad.

But still, how can I cope with all this stuff? I mean, if I tell this story to someone they wouldn't even believe it. I wouldn't too, I think.