I’m starting to crack.

Both my siblings have serious mental health issues which I try to help them by being the voice of reason, like I always have. We didn’t have a good childhood but for some reason I have been the only one to’ move on’ from and not let it affect my life. Only problem I have is that me helping them does not help me. They deflect their pain onto me and treat me so bad. I have tried to blow it off because I know they probably don’t mean it (me being the punching bag) but it does take its toll on me. It makes me feel invisible. They’re so consumed in their own ‘problems’ they don’t see ‘me’. They would say horrible things like, I think I’m perfect and don’t have any problems. For the record, I don’t like contributing my issues when I try to be present for them. It’s not because I don’t have my own things going on. When I’ve mentioned this, one would say. What, so what problems are YOU dealing with then. As if to say, they can’t be any worse than theirs. Over the years I’ve had people other than family do this to me. And it hurts. They don’t see the pain I carry from it all. Besides cutting them off I don’t know what else to do but I feel like it’s really starting to break me. No, I am broken. 💔