I’m getting lost

Hello, i’m a 17 french guy, i’m between bi and gay. I mean my that that i’m not yet sure if i really like girls or if i just want to like girls. But that’s not even my point of today. I live in a region where if you are gay, you loose half of you friends and all your boys friends. I’m not that brave, but it’s harder to live everyday. I spent a week in germany, with a friend that I thought straight. By talking to him and his friends, i discovered that he was bi. But what hit me was that it wasn’t an issue or even a subject. So much so that it wasn’t worth mentioning. It’s the night after i discovered that and idk how to feel, i might still be under the effect of the beers but i feel even more miserable. As i said to one of my gay friends, i feel like a guy from the middle ages that discovered homosexuality was a thing. I don’t even have a question i guess i just had to spill it. Feel free to share anything (positive would be great i might get alcoholic with this emotional state).

Ps, sorry if it’s a bit messy, it’s late at night and not my first language