Death Wouldnt Have To Make Speech For Me To Go With It.

Does the thought terrify me? Yes. Going from existing , thinking, breathing, experiencing life and so on to nothing? Yeah I contemplate that alot. I often find myself asking if the Earth is around 4.5 plus billion years before me. Where was I prior to May XX 1991? What was I doing? Why can't I remember it?

I can't bear to think of not experiencing anything after experiencing all I have in my 30+ years on this planet.

Some say nothing is nothing but inorder to experience nothing you have to have some sort of consciousness in order to know what nothing is. Idk. I'm just talking at this point. But I'm tired of being afraid of this. I know it's natural. Things come and go. I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that there is going to come a day where I'm not here anymore

But with everything I've been through, hurt, pain, losing people close to me, being homeless, jobless, literally going from having it all (in my own experiences) to just... Well nothing. As terrifying as it is to me I can't help but welcome it. Idk how or when or what will move me off this planet but I will say I am tired and after everything I've suffered through it really can't be that bad.

Anyway I just wanted to vent for a second and I apologize if I dont make any sense. It was just something I thought about.

Thanks for reading.