How do I (M27) approach an absence of intimate conversations with my Girlfriend (F24)

So my girlfriend and I have been dating long distance for around 2 years now, it’s not super crazy, UK to Netherlands, so I’ve been able to head over on the train or ferry and stay for a while and head back but we are apart weeks sometimes months apart.

When we are apart, theres never any intimate conversations, or cravings for me (sexually) or any hints of even being “in the mood” almost ever. I have these thoughts and desires fairly regular and when I’ve tried to bring it up, it’s just never been a 2 way conversation. I try and initiate these conversations, we even have the love sense toy with an app we can use, but it feels like the desire for that has gone also.

I think for me it’s just the lack of feeling wanted that way when we are apart, it’s also starting to transition to when we are together. I don’t know if it’s a libido issue, but I get a sense that sometimes when we do, it’s because she thinks we should have sex, rather than the want to. Like oh it’s been a while we probably should, It almost gives the feeling that the sexual attraction isn’t there from her, even though she’s reassuring me there is.

The relationship itself is great, but the lack of the physical “wanting” is starting to make me feel it’s something maybe I’m doing wrong.

What can I say to approach the topic without sounding like a total tool?