Don’t stop taking your meds

For the first time since starting my medication (December 23) I stopped taking them on Friday. I started a new AP about 3 weeks ago and had some side effects (insomnia, hand shaking, brain fogginess). On Friday I forgot to take my meds (honest mistake) and I only slept 2 hours but woke up feeling more clear headed than I have in years. I decided I wanted to chase this feeling and haven’t taken my meds since. I’ve gotten anywhere from 1.5-6 hours of sleep every day, and fell back into some of my bad coping mechanisms. Yesterday I had the worst panic attack I have ever had in my life because I went down a rabbit hole of the current political state in the US. Following this I walked out of a work meeting today and haven’t been able to calm myself down. I haven’t felt this angry in years. I almost started crying because of how angry I am. I haven’t been able to get a grasp on my emotions and I’ve had terrible headaches every day. I’m so nauseous and every time I eat (albeit only a little bit recently) I feel like throwing up. All of this to say I regret stopping my meds and I plan on taking them tonight and every day moving forward. I have a therapy appointment tomorrow and a psych appointment Friday and I will be letting them know about everything that’s been going on. Remember folks, take your meds! It’s not a good idea to stop them!!