ngh i wanna kill myself uwooooghhhh

haha look at me trying to romanticize everything i do.. i haven't showered in like a week and i haven't cleaned in my room for about a month or two or three idk :v
genuinely i cant stop thinking violently!! i can't stop thinking about killing myself or everyone in my family!! i wish everyone in my family dies!!! i hope you die dad!!! i hope you die mom!!! why can't everyone just die so i become an orphan and everyone sympathizes with me?? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

i just need a good reason to kill myself. i think about killing my parents too much. im too scared to even kill myself and my dad is a lot stronger than me so it won't work. WHY CANT THEY JUST DIE?!?!?!? I DONT WANNA KILL MY FAMILY!!!!!