dysphoria getting so much worse after haircut (tw suicidal thoughts)

i just cut my hair yesterday and before then i was fairly okay with taking my transition slowly and wasnt even sure if i wanted to transition but now suddenly my dysphoria is so much worse and i have this need to fully transition right now. i dont even want to be trans so this is making me very suicidal because i feel like there is literally no way out other than fully transitioning now