Why does my psychologist refrain from categorising the situation if this is their job?

For a long time I (18f) wonder if what I experience with my mother is an intense parent-child conflict or mild emotional abuse, and it is even the reason I started the consultation with them. However they say they can't tell, because they "don't know my life" and thus may not access what is considered to be abuse and what isn't, even when I tell them about my experiences.

But even here on this subreddit I see that only mental health professionals in therapy can assess whether the experience is abusive or not, and that a layperson may not determine the extent of the situation.

So where should I go to answer this question? What should I do if I'm not satisfied with the answer like "idk, you're an expert of your own experiences, and that's for you to decide"? Please, explain me how this is even supposed to work? How do people even learn if they experience abuse if a psychologist can never say if that's the case?