We are always just an outlet

I don’t think people with BPD know what real love is or what it feels like. To them it’s likely something conditional, “what can this person give/do for me”. Emotional security…financial security.. attention. Whatever it is they need something from you to keep the relationship going. Otherwise their sense of self or worth isn’t being satisfied.

Unfortunately there was never unconditional love because they haven’t experienced this in their childhood/ life. So for those of you who are wondering what they are doing now with the new guy/girl …it’s probably much the same as what happened with us at the start but always with the inability to give/receive real love. As people say on here it’s a lot of projection.

We can move on and experience real love with someone else but sadly they likely won’t be able to do that. Even with therapy it’s more about managing their symptoms than anything. Their unfortunate childhoods has scarred them for life